Stories of Lost Children
My Son, My Best Friend
by James Hein, San Diego, CA, U.S.A.
My son Alan James was born on July 1st, 1989. He was given the first name of Alan being names after his great grandfather James Douglas Allen, who died as a POW of World War 2. The day he was born he was given the nick name of AJ and he went by that day from then on. AJ was born with asthma and had all kinds of problems with it. AJ had a bad asthma attack when he was 9 and spent 5 days in the hospital for it. After that he would have asthma attacks of and on all the time, but we were always able to control them with breathing treatments and going to the DR. On November 20th 2005 AJ had the worst asthma attack he ever had. His Mom and I were with him when we called 911 and I was holding him when the firefighter Paramedic arrived. As I was telling the Medic what was going on and what had been done for AJ before they arrived. While I was talking to the Medic AJ went limp in my arms and stopped breathing. The medics started CPR on him right away, and when the ambulance arrived, they wasted no time of getting him in the ambulance and to the hospital. While in the emergency room, the doctors were able to get his heart beating again but he wasn't breathing on his own. AJ was moved to the SICU and spent the next five day there. He was never left alone that week, even on Thanksgiving we spent the day with him. On Friday November 25th, the doctors came to us and said that there was no brain activity and that he was brain dead. at that point all of AJ's family was called and with a the help on a nurse that I know from working together for a ambulance company we work for came to the room with us. With her help AJ was taken off life support as we all were with him. It took about 5 minutes before his heart stopped. AJ was told goodbye by us all before we left him. To this day I still don't know how any of us were able to leave him, but we knew we had to. Unless you knew AJ he was full of life even though most people thought he was a quite child. He loves to play all the time and just mess around. His best friend Robert and him would always be together and would never rest, they were always on the go, doing pretty much anything they could. Robert plays the guitar and was trying to teach AJ when ever they could. When AJ was in the SICU Robert brought his guitar and played it for AJ. Robert played on song that AJ loved and wanted to learn to play but never did learn to play. Robert played Stair way to heaven and when he did so the whole SICU became quite and almost all the nurses came to his room with us and listened. When Robert was done playing that song he placed his guitar next to AJ in bed. Yesterday on July 1st would have been AJ's 18th birthday. It was a quite day for all of us, and we all spent the day remembering AJ in all of our own ways. Even though AJ was 16 when he died and will always be 16, we all still wished him a happy birthday. At AJ's memorial service he was given a honor by my work which is normally done for EMS personal only. They came to his service in a persuasion of all the Supervisor truck and ambulance driving slow with only their code light on. All of the managers and Supervisors and about 50 other EMT's and Paramedics came to his service also. AJ always wanted to become a Paramedic so he could help other people who had asthma and try to make a difference in their lives. He also always dreamed of working a shift with me so we would be a father son team. Most of the EMT's and Paramedics were all sorry they would never get a chance to work with him. AJ is in our heart and prayers and always will be.
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