Stories of Lost Children
4 Years Later
by Mikka Sandoval, Nampa, ID, U.S.A.
I have written before with my story of my son Braedyn Sandoval. Please do a search to find our full story. This is a follow up, my son would be 4 as of July 26th 2004. I have a son now 7 a son now 6 and a daughter who is 3 this month. I don't make it to the cemetary very often I have not found that to be very comforting to me. But yesterday I decided to take mini pumkins with my children to my son. On the way up there we were talking about Braedyn and the kids were asking questions as they always did like "did I hold him mom?" they were 4 and 3 at that time. I tell them things they did with there brother up to his 2 months of life. When we get there, I realise that they have closed the gates and we must walk. My daughter who was born after Braedyn is 3, she knows we are there to "give her brother Braedyn her pumkin she is holding. She begins to yell his name out loud in the cemetary. It was then I relized she doesn't understand what we were really doing. That is the most difficult thing to explain. My older son relizes my troubles and said "Jazzy, we just can't see Braedyn, he's in heaven," as his own tears swell up. To keep his spirit alive as well as explain to sibilings, are trials I had not expected. For years, pain is all I have had to deal with, now I have three hearts begining the "loss and understanding of their brother 3 years later." God give me strenghth. Mikka
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