Stories of Lost Children
Was a Dream???
by Lupita Garcia, Oakland , CA, U.S.A.
I want share my sad history with you… I have delivery my first baby at 27 of pregnancy weeks. May 9, 2004 (Mothers Day) that morning I feel pain in the low part of my abdomen, nowise that was a contractions, I was so scared when I went to the bathroom and I was bleeding... So I went to the hospital and the nurse said, "yes definitively you are contracting." The doctors could not stop this, and my baby was born at 4:11 p.m., his weight 2.06 lbs, length 15". I fell in love of my baby and it all happened so fast, so quick. They take my baby to the Children’s Hospital. He was healthy and doing well... But He get a Staph blood infection and his immunologic system wasn't strong. He died on May 24 at 10:37 p.m. I was there with him every day; I told him “I love you mi papi Chiquito” “your mommy its here”. Don’t matter the time or how tired I was, always I was there. The doctor let me hold him in “kangaroo style” (skin to skin); he was so quiet, he slept in may arms for hours. I remember the last day with all details every hour, every minute, every second his little face so relaxed. I loved my baby and he died in my arms. It's so painful, everything was confused, devastating. Why my baby??? Why me??? If I love my baby, why??? Now is two months ago and the pain is more and more unpredictable. I can't explain how I feel but every day I do something different for him, like scrapbook, pictures on the computer with frames, poems, songs and for his honor I wear a baby blue color on my clothes. I know the grief is slow and some times lonely my sorrow it’s so deep… A DREAM HISTORY Forgive me I’m in without advice
Isn’t the hour and place
I have to tell you in heaven aren’t that bad. Tomorrow don’t remember that
“Only was a dream” you repeat
And like a answer across a shooting star And when l leave, my life on the earth will be in peace
I only want say goodbye, give to you a kiss and see you again Promise me, to be happy
You look beautiful when you smile
And then, only that way
I want to remember you
Like that, like before
Like that, go ahead
Like that, mommy
Will better like that. Now its time to rest
Let me tuck to you like time ago
You remember when I was sing for you before a bed time? Just I can come
In to the your dreams to see you
That sad night I didn’t say goodbye when I leave. And when l leave, my life on the earth will be in peace
I only want say goodbye, give to you a kiss and see you again Promise me, to be happy
You look so beautiful when you smile
And then, only that way
I want to remember you
Like that, like before
Like that, go ahead
Like that, my love
Now you follow our travel.
It’s late
I have to leave now
In little seconds you will awake… If somebody wants contact to me my email lilbonitaus@yahoo.com If somebody has Spanish information please send me.
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