I Love and Miss you So Much
My darling baby, I never got to know you. I had just gotten used to the idea that I was going to be a mother, I had just started getting excited, when we couldn't find your heartbeat. Your father and I cried more tears than we thought we had in us. I still think of you all the time. At first, it felt strange to be happy. It felt strange to move on with my life. And I hated myself for the slightest relief that I felt that I would not have to be a mother at eighteen. I wish I could have seen you. I wish I knew whether you were a boy or a girl so I could know what name you have. But whether you are Nicole or Eric, we love you just as much. It still feels strange to be happy sometimes, but I hope you know that just because I am living life without you doesn't mean I don't wish you were here. Someday I will see you and hold you in my arms, but until then know that I love you and you will never be forgotten.
Jennifer Lemen and Joshua Brown