Stories of Other Loss
My buddy, My nephew, My love
by Rosa Sandoval, Nampa, U.S.A.
My name is Rosa Sandoval and I am from Nampa, ID. I am writing about my nephew who died way too soon. I remember when he was born, which I made it there the minute he came into this world. The second I saw his face I knew I wanted nothing more than to love him and help his mommy and daddy protect him from anything even close to bad. His name was Braedyn Joe Sandoval, the "Joe" part being after my twin brother who was the father of this precious little boy. I remember at the time I didn't have a job so with my sister-in-law and brother working odd shifts at work, they had asked me to watch Braedyn. So I did. Everytime I left the room while he slept I would look at his chest to see if it was moving. I don't know, me being new to the whole newborn thing I always got a little overprotective. So for the last few days of his life I watched him and I remember the day he died. Joe was asleep with Braedyn and I had gone home because I was waiting for a phone call about a job interview I had that day. I finally got the call and decided to go back to Joe and Mikka's house to see my buddy (that's what I always called him). When I pulled up I saw an ambulance so I got out of my car and I ran inside to see Mikka on her knees and about 2 or 3 paramedics and Joe in the kitchen. I thought it was Mikka who was hurt because like I said before she was on her knees. She moved out of the way and I came to find out it was Braedyn who was hurt. I saw medics working on him and I immediately started shaking, crying and praying for God not to take him yet. I had never wanted anything so bad in my life before until that day. I still get that feeling with him. Joe stepped out of the house and hugged me and later I saw them carry my buddy's lifeless little body out of the house and rush him to the hospital. While all this was going on, one of my good friends called (who was a mutual friend of Joe's). I answered the phone and frantically started telling him what was going on and he said he'd be there in a minute because he didn't want me driving. So he showed up and I remember on the way to the hospital I was crying and telling my friend, "Everything's gonna be fine, he's a Sandoval, we've all had tough times but made it through. H e's gonna make it!!" I just kept repeating that. Finally what seemed like an eternity we made it to the emergency room and I ran inside and saw Mikka crying on the phone and my stepdad telling me that Braedyn didn't make it. I just kept saying "no, no, how can that be?" A nurse led me into a room where I could see Joe huddled over Braedyn crying and I walked up to give Joe a hug. Then I kissed Braedyn on his forehead while he was wrapped in a warm blanket. His forehead was so cold and I got even madder. "This shouldn't be happening!!!" I just kept saying those words to myself. Than I walked outside and the coroner stopped me and asked if I was Mikka. I said "no"; he asked who I was and told him I was his aunt. He asked me some questions about Braedyn's behavior the last few days and that's when he told me that they would have to do an autopsy. That with babies, they absolutely have to perform an autopsy. I said "You mean, you have to cut him open?" in disbelief. He said "yes", when I asked him if he had any idea what happened, he said it looked to him like SIDS. I remember thinking to myself as the tears could not stop "so my buddy died for no reason?" At this point you can imagine how mad I was. So that's where my story ends. I had to write about one of the most precious little babies in the world and I know now he is for sure watching over his baby sister, like all big brothers do. I love you buddy and I miss you way more than words could ever say!!
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