Stories of Lost Children
My Little Angel Ethan
by Cynthia Mckenzie, Colton, CA, U.S.A.
I found out I was pregnant a month after I got married. It would have been our first child. I was having a good "healthy pregnancy" or so I thought.... I was 23 weeks pregnant when I went into preterm labor. I was eating at Olive Garden when I started feeling the contractions. I didn't know they were contractions; I thought it was just gas since I was eating. So I came home and watched a movie and the pain was getting worse. I went to the restroom and I felt my placenta falling out of me.
An ambulance took me to Loma Linda and I was in labor for 3 days. They tried to stop the labor but my body kept pushing the baby out. Finally on March 10, 2009 I gave birth naturally at 9:19 am. My son Ethan was only 1lb 4oz and he was extremly fragile. They resuscitated him and he was in the NICU. He was a little fighter and he was doing great the first week. A brain ultrasound was scheduled for him 10 days after his birth. I prayed and prayed that he would not have any bleeding. That morning I got the horrible call. They told me more than half of his brain was completly destroyed and full of blood. I rushed to the hospital to be by his side. They let me hold him for the first time that day. They told me I had to make a decision. I had to decide whether to continue with the life supprt or let him go. Since his brain was destroyed they told me he probably wouldn't walk, talk, see, eat, or breathe on his own. We didn't want to let him go but he was suffering so much and we couldn't be selfish and keep him with us because even though his heart was beating he wouldn't really be living because he was brain dead. On March 21 2009 at 4:45 pm, my son passed away in his Daddy's arms. We took many pictures and we have a box the nurses put together for us of his belongings.
I'm so destroyed and hurt that my whole life is just falling apart. I need someone to talk to who has had a similar experience. Cynthia89garcia@yahoo.com I LOVE U MY LITTLE ANGEL ETHAN
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