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Stories of Lost Children

My Bossy Monkey
by Lynn, Yucaipa, CA, U.S.A.

Four weeks ago today, my precious Danny died. I was taking a test in San Bernardino for my teaching credential. No cell phones allowed. Both my boys were with my Dad who lives with us. My husband was on his way to work.

I drove my dad crazy with all the safety gadgets in the house. Strapped curio cabinets, locks on cabinets, child-proof locks on medication, doors, gated pools, special toddler locks on doors, etc. My biggest fear was a household accident.

When I got to my car there were so many messages. Why was my brother in law calling me? I called my dad first to see how the boys were doing. I'll never forget his answers.

Danny had an accident.
But he's okay, right?
No. He stopped breathing for over 10 minutes. They took him to the hospital.
What happened?
I don't know. I put him down for his nap and he was playing like usual. Then he quieted down. I thought he was sleeping. He was too quiet so Gabriel (my other son) and I went up to wake Danny up.

The dresser was on top of him. He was not breathing. I tried to breathe for him.

I never strapped that dresser down. It was big and clunky and stable. He never climbed it. Danny was a cautious boy. He always used the stool to get into anything he could not reach. I could not even move that dresser . . . how did he do it?

The paramedics said he must have pulled out a few of the drawers and changed the "center of gravity."

They were partially right. Four weeks ago, the center of my life fell apart. I keep myself busy, I try to focus on my older son, I try to grieve and continue living, but the pain is unending, merciless. I feel like I am dying inside.

How can I live without my beautiful Danny?

danny-munoz.last-memories.com

I love you more and more every day.
I love you more and more than I could say.
I love you my Danny.

I miss you baby.

Love Mommy


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